Assholes, Dicks, et al.

MOTHERFUCKER.

For a while now I've been Vice Chair of a certain committee. Due to the time I've taken off, the Chair was someone I had seniority over. I sometimes didn't agree with some of his methods, but fuck it, Pragmatism, whatever, I made not a peep when he was basically running the thing to the ground.

Before he left, he made some noises about me not being the best choice for his replacement. Whatever, asshole, I'm the only choice. So I grit my teeth, smile, make noncommittal noises, whatever, just leave please.

So he leaves he's gone, great. I send him a message with the time and place of the first committee meeting we're having to get reorganized. He doesn't show, fine. His friends decide to leave as well. We meet, make plans, I make a point of referring to myself as 'Acting Chair' lest I offend any sensibilities. We informally agree to meet in a couple of days to check on what progress has been made. I send the people who attended a summary of what happened, including the now vacant positions.

Next meeting, I explain the current distribution of jobs, and what each entails. People protest the vagueness of the situation. I decide to hell with it, and tell them they can decide what on things, offer (insincerely) to step aside for anyone more qualified (I don't believe anyone is). So we talk it out and come to a general consensus.

Lame Duck Dickwad sends me a message demanding to know where I get off making myself Chair and giving out positions without him there. Wait, what? I make the appropriate angry insulted noises. We back and forth for a bit before making fake nice and singing each other's praises. He asks me to take back everything that happened while he was at home with his dick in his hands.

LDD, inconveniencing the world for his ego since 2008. Great start to a glowing post-grad career.

Again, pragmatism. I send out a terse message about disregarding everything that's happened because of decisions made by the previous admin. The person LDD wants for vice chair (incidentally, not who was chosen) calls me all Innocent & Confused. The person chosen as Vice calls me, understandably bewildered. For the sake of conflict avoidance, I claim misunderstanding and departmental red tape. No one else says squat. LDD sends a message magnanimously naming me as Chair and Innocent as Vice.

Please Lord save me from Further Developments.

Also, I would kill to know who LDD's inside source is.